For many couples, a dog is their first family member. It makes sense that their dog is also invited to the wedding and included in the celebration. It’s great fun to get outfits and coordinating leashes and all that stuff.
I love dogs at weddings.
There are a number of things to consider. Will it be stressful for the dog? Will it be stressful for the couple? What about the reaction of the guests? (Does that even matter?) Will the dog(s) become the focus of the ceremony? Who’s going to look after the dog(s)?
Let me tell you some stories.
The first dog-included wedding I did, the dog was not present until after the ceremony. The dog was a puppy – a very cute, very busy puppy. The wedding was at a resort. During the ceremony, the puppy was snoozing in her crate in the cabin after an exuberant walk earlier that day. The pup was clearly overwhelmed by all the comings and goings of her people as they prepared, the excitement of new people coming to visit. The dog parents knew they wouldn’t be able to focus on each other if the dog were included in the ceremony. The puppy came out later and was well celebrated along with the couple.
Many couples choose to have their dog cared for at a kennel or with a sitter, and miss the event entirely. Sometimes they’ll have photos of the dog in their decorations. Sometimes we mention the dog in the ceremony. Couples know their dog and they know what’s best for the animal, for them, and for the situation.
During the Covid-19 pandemic, people held their dogs very close to their hearts, and many were included in the small ceremonies we were allowed to have. The youngest dog I’ve experienced was an 8-week old mini-Daschund puppy. She was the ring bearer. The couple had had her for just a week. During the ceremony, the puppy’s grandma snuggled her, and when it was time for the rings, the dog was woken up (!), put in the grass to walk across the lawn to her Mummy and Daddy. The grass was almost longer than her legs, so it was quite the trek. It looked like she was going to lay down and take a nap part way through, but she did eventually make it, and everyone was inside-out with the cuteness of it all. (Sorry, I don’t have the photo credit.)
At another pandemic wedding, the dog – a big, rescued mixed breed – lay down in front of the couple, chewed a huge bone and was just part of the décor. He was very attached to his people and couldn’t be far away. It was very sweet.
Dogs love the trains on wedding dresses! It’s like they’re thinking, “Thanks for dragging a blanket around behind you so that I can lie down on it and be a Good Dog!” Be prepared for that! Sometimes it’s the answer to keeping a dog calm and included. (Although there is a CBD formulation you might consider, too!)
“WTF?” Moments
One couple had their two dogs at a wedding, pointers or setters or something like that. They were beautifully groomed and had very stylish leashes. They were meant to be ring bearers but that didn’t work out very well and involved a bit of chasing. The ceremony was outside in a setting that was new to the dogs, so there was lots of exciting stuff to sniff. And it was hot. It was over 30OC and the guests – including the dog handlers – were in the sun. The dogs got restless and vocal. They were let go to find shade – but they were young dogs so they were wandering and checking things out. It was fine, not much of a distraction. However, after the ceremony, one of the couple grabbed the youngest dog and gave it a verbal lashing: “What’s wrong with you? You come to my wedding and you act like an asshole? Why did you have to be an asshole at my wedding?” And on and on. Hmmm… the dog was the asshole?
On social media, it’s fun to see wedding photos that include dogs. However, when male dogs are “unsheathed” in the photo, it is distracting and changes the impact of the photo. Yes, the dogs get excited and things happen – like little peckers peeking out — but please pose the dog a different way, or photo-shop or something!
I’ve never been at a wedding where the dogs of the guests were included in the invitation. Wouldn’t that be interesting!